Stop faking it: 30 day challenge #24-30

 

Okay, so I’m two days premature of the 30 days but I’m away for the next few days and will most likely forget so I’m going to round this off today. 

Over the past few weeks, I’ve been actively trying to challenge my imposter syndrome by making small changes and ignoring the phrase ‘fake it until you make it’ 

Here’s what I have learned and will continue to keep trying:

Repeat it until you believe it

- I’ll keep thinking about what my strengths are and reminding myself of them. 

Learn that you earned it 

- I’ll keep a track of what I am grateful for or what I have achieved 

- I’ll keep reminding myself when I have earned something through hard work or skill - it hasn’t just happened. 

Practice it until you perfect it

- I’ll keep putting opportunities to do better 

- I’ll say yes to more opportunities that are outside my comfort zone, provided I can do them. 

- I’ll remember that I can say no and set boundaries where they are necessary. 

I promise to start blogging about other things soon!

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Stop faking it: 30 day challenge #8-23

Okay, so this is lazy but I forgot to do the daily blogs but I’ve essentially been doing the same things so I’ve caught up in one post!

Learn that you earned it - I’ve been keeping a note of all the things I’m grateful for or that I have achieved such as good feedback. 

Practice it until you perfect it - I’ve been trying to say yes to opportunities outside of my comfort zone and not let the ‘what if I’m not good enough’ voice in my head get in the way.  I’m also trying to make sure I make at least one comment in every meeting to make sure I contribute and don’t just observe. 

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Stop faking it: 30 day challenge #7

Today I noticed myself allowing imposter syndrome to manifest outside of a work setting. I was having a jokey conversation with my fiancé about selling my baking to make extra money then said I didn’t think my baking was good enough. He said I was undervaluing myself and that he’d paid more for worse than what I had brought him. 

I’m not not genuinely thinking about selling my brownies and the whole conversation was nonsense but it was a little reminder that that little voice that tells me I’m rubbish isn’t just with me when I’m a work, it can pop up whenever it wants. 

To challenge this, I’m going to practice my baking more until I perfect it - plus, it means more cake. Where is the bad?

 

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Stop faking it: 30 day challenge #6

 

Today I found myself actively challenging the voice in my head and overruling it with my resolve to work on myself. 

I was asked to be a ‘critical friend’ on a project my colleagues are working on and offer my thoughts and suggestions. I could tell that the words ‘why would they ask me?’ were on the tip of my mind’s tongue. 

Can a mind have a tongue? It would make sense, seeing as our minds can wander and mull things over - I digress.

I stopped myself in my tracks and immediately flipped it to learning that I earned it. I knew why they asked me and reasoned with myself that my input and insight would be helpful, otherwise they wouldn’t have asked. 

I said yes by asking myself: 

Am I doing it alone? No, other people are involved, I’m just lending a hand by offering thoughts. 

What’s the worst that could happen? They don’t like what I say. That’s unlikely and even if they didn’t, no bad thing is likely to arise from that. 

What’s the best thing that could happen? My contribution helps with their project. 

I feel good about being able to actively challenge my own thought process today. 

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Stop faking it: 30 day challenge #5

 

Something I realised today that I have allowed to feed my imposter syndrome is the fact that I look younger than I am. 

I’m quite lucky in that respect, for the most part, people are kind to me because they see the youthful face and have a comforting tone and a kinder delivery. Sometimes though, it can manifest in someone being patronising or dismissive of ‘the daft wee lassie’

I don’t always carry myself as the 32 year old that I am, which can perhaps come off as inexperience or ineptitude. When I do start to carry myself as a competent and experienced 32 year old, I’ve found people who assume I’m younger can read it as ‘getting above my station’ 

It was a harmless comment from an older colleague talking about old money that sparked the thought process in my head but it has reminded me to address it. It perhaps comes under ‘practice it until your perfect it’ - I can work on carrying myself not so much as a ‘grown up’ but as someone who has the experience and knowledge to contribute confidently. I just have to silence that voice in my head that tells me I shouldn’t - ahhh imposter syndrome, isn’t it fun? 

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Stop faking it: 30 day challenge #4

 

I didn’t particularly do anything over the weekend to merit posting about so I’m not going to hold myself hostage to a rigid 30 calendar days, just as and when I have had a chance to work on things. 

Today’s focus was another ‘Learn that you earned it’ 

I spoke in one of my posts a few days ago about receiving praise for a piece of work and not being massively comfortable taking it.  At an all staff meeting today, the same piece of work was highlighted and I received another compliment on it. Again, I didn’t really no how to take it, so I just smiled. I knew that it was a case of learning that I earned it and that I need to work on learning to appreciate the moments when nice things like that happen as a result of earning the moment. 

In the interest of ‘practice it until you perfect it’ - I actively made myself make a few comments in other meetings. In meetings, I tend to assume to role of silent observer because I have this idea in my head that if I speak, people will realise I don’t belong there - which is silly. So today I made myself actively speak a bit more. 

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Stop faking it: 30 day challenge #3

 

So, I forgot to do yesterday’s post but to be honest it was another day of ‘Learn that you earned it’ 

I spent a small portion of the day verbalising achievements of the week with the fiancé, not in a bragging sort of way, just in a reflection sort of way. 

It wasn’t a conscious choice to tick off an exercise, it just happened to be part of the conversation. 

Not sure what progress I’ll make over the weekend. 

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