Goodbye January, Hello Rachie.

Cards on the table....I've been a bit of a misery guts for the past few weeks.  

I feel like for most of January, my personality has been somewhat switched off.

I'm not really sure why.  I don't know if the job hunt is getting me down, if I'm spending too much time indoors and on the computer.
 It might be the lack of chocolate in my diet, it could be the countless hours of reality TV my eyes have witnessed over the month of January - but what I am sure of is that I need to snap out of it.

For someone who talks a lot about being positive and looking for the sunshine, I haven't done a whole lot of it lately.  

It's possible that's down to the fact its currently winter in Scotland and the sun is currently shielded by an abundance of rain filled clouds - that doesn't actually sound too dissimilar to the description of summer in Scotland, but at least it's usually a little brighter!

January is gone, well at time of typing its the 30th so there is still a day to go, but the month is basically at an end.  

I've decided that as this month draws to a close - with the exception of times when I need to let sad feelings happen - I've used up all my moping around time for the year.

I've decided in order to kick start my 2016 kick up the bum, I am going to give myself some hopefully achievable goals.
Some to aid me in my job search, some to aid me in keeping myself chipper when not doing something application or interview related. 

• Pick up a new hobby, I have an entire box of origami cranes, bats, cats and swans - its a fun hobby, its one I can do anywhere, I once made 10 cranes while waiting to go into an interview from some post it notes in my bag - however, if I overdo the origami thing all the time, its going to get tiresome and boring for me.  I enjoy baking and making things like banana jam, but realistically I can't do those everyday or I'd be eternally full to the brim with sugar, so I need to find something else to capture my attention and pass my time. Maybe crochet, crosstich, jewelry making, I don't know yet. 
  Suggestions are welcome.

• Last year I wrote a blog post about doing One Scary Thing Every Day  and somewhere over the last few months, I've let that slide.  Maybe I felt I had gotten to a stage where my nerves weren't holding me back quite the same, I don't know but I feel its time I start embracing the mission again, whether its something small like volunteering to make dinner (I'm not exactly experienced in the kitchen), saying no to something I don't want to do rather than doing it, feeling miserable and wishing I'd said no.  James is forever telling me that controlled fear is a good thing - its usually when he's trying to convince me to go on some terrifying ride like a roller coaster or something equally scary that goes upside down but he does have a point. I can't live in the safety of my bubble 24/7 or my world will become very sheltered very quickly.
  
  
• Find one enjoyable thing to take away from each interview, whether it's knowing I did well even if I didn't get the job, if someone who works there was kind and gave me a free pen, if the someone on the panel complimented my coat (those last two actually happened on separate occasions and both were pretty cool) if I made the interview panel laugh - in a good way. 
  I need to stop coming away from these things and once I hear back feeling like it's just another thing to cross off the list of things that didn't work out. Whether or not I get the jobs I go for, I need to start treating interviews as enjoyable experiences to take something fun away from. 

• I like to write.  I need to do this more. Whether that is in blog posts, poems, letters, stories, happy lists. 
  It's a skill I have and in the career path I want to follow, its an essential one, so I need to need to keep it active. Maybe it will help me find that full time job that seems out of reach, maybe it won't. Maybe it'll help me process things better, maybe it won't but its definitely something I need to keep doing.

• Go outdoors.  Spend more time with James, spend more time with my friends - ask them to do something cheap or free while money is a concern. Take a book to the park - weather permitting, it is winter. Do things that involve leaving the house for more than the few hours a week that come with long standing routine.

Today's Shoes

Technically, these shoes are slippers.

But they are what is on my feet today and I decided for the purposes of this blog post they can be shoes as I haven't done a shoe diary post since last summer and I'd like to correct that.

These Bunny Slippers were a Christmas present and I think they came from Next, I'm not sure if they still have them but they have a cute pair of bear slippers that are pretty similar.

The cake and cat trousers came from H&M  - seeing as they are on display in the picture!

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Dear Wee Rachie: Sleep is a beautiful thing.

Dear Wee Rachel, 

Sleep is a beautiful thing!

You don’t realise it right now, but you have this amazing ability to sleep at night, to just switch off your brain, lie down and sleep.  Sometimes your head might be full of crap that finds its way into your dreams but the actual sleeping part you have down to a tee. 

In a few years, sleep will seem like a story, a fairy-tale like Cinderella or Snow White (I thought Sleeping Beauty would be a cruel example, but hey, at least that bitch got some sleep!).

I don’t know why sleeping became a problem, it might be the fizzy juice that you drink (I know you love Irn Bru, but your insides are probably orange by now, cut down a bit!) it could be all the time you spend in front of the computer, the TV or your phone (FYI, phones are cooler in the future, but bloody expensive!).  Whatever it was, it became an issue and it’s one you’ll fight for a while, I’m still fighting it now.

I’m writing you this letter because I’m struggling to fall asleep and I don’t want you to grow up, become me and spend your life wanting to sleep.  Sometimes my brain is full of too many things to settle; sometimes the slightest little noise will wake me up.

You have no idea how much this will affect you when you are my age.  Sure it’s fine to snooze through Mr Kershaw’s Maths class (you get a free pass on that one because he likes that you have a smart mouth and knows you’re not a moron) but you really need to start taking better care to get sleep at night.

What I want you to do from now on is keep a notebook next to your bed, write down all the thoughts that are in your head when you sleep, hopes, fears, dreams, things that scare you and let them all out.  Start going to bed earlier or set a consistent time so your body knows it’s time to sleep.  Come up with your own ideas, but please do something. 

P.S – It turns out you don’t like the taste mint very much - mild is fine, strong is yuck, look out for alternative toothpastes, that way I won’t have to listen to your dentist when she moans or ‘accidentally’ (gently) bite her when she pisses me off! 

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Dairy Free Empties: Chocolate

I've seen a few people on Youtube do lifestyle/product 'empties' videos where they show the empty packaging and talk about the product they bought and whether they enjoyed it, the pros/cons etc

I'm fairly new to the whole 'dairy free' thing but thought I would give it a try for some dairy free products I've been using since cutting out dairy and getting a firm answer on the whole 'milk makes me ill' thing.  I live in the Scotland, so I'm not sure what the availability of everything I've mentioned is like further afield than the UK.  If you know of any brands or products I haven't mentioned - feel free to suggest in the comments! 

It might work as an interesting blog post or it might be crap but I figured I'd go with it!

Rather than focus on every dairy free product I've tried I thought I'd focus on the main things I've really been missing!  
I might do some more posts focusing on specific things but the first thing I'm gonna focus on is.....

Chocolate

My real weakness in life is chocolate. I love milk chocolate, I'm not massively in love with all plain chocolate, I feel it can have a bit of a dry taste depending on the brand and some (not all) dark chocolate on the shelves has a little bit of milk in the ingredients so for the last few months I've really been missing chocolate!

I discovered there are actually lots of dairy free alternatives to chocolate that taste like milk chocolate!

The main one I've used so far is
Moo Free Chocolate.

Moo Free comes in a variety of flavours, some larger bars and some smaller bars known as Mini Moos. They are made from rice milk which gives them a nice creamy taste.

The empties I have here are two of the chocolates I got in my Moo Free Mini Moo selection box from my mum at Christmas.

These were the Minty Moo and Cheeky Orange flavoured bars.

There was also a chocolate Santa bar and a honeycomb (bunnycomb) flavoured - but they were eaten before I thought about doing this post!

The good thing about Moo Free is that as well as being dairy free, they are also gluten free, wheat free and lactose free and suitable for vegans - which makes them suitable for a variety of specialty diets - although I don't know if they are suitable for every specialty diet.

I really enjoyed all of the chocolates in the box but I think my favourite was the Cheeky Orange Bar. I'm a massive fan of Chocolate Orange but I find most brands can be a bit too rich tasting for me and this bar really locked in all the flavour while being light.

Alpro Chocolate Desert

 

Alpro have a nice range of desserts in a range of flavours such as Caramel, Vanilla and Dark Chocolate but I started off with the Silky Smooth Chocolate.
Made primarily from Soya and Cocoa amongst other ingredients I found the the chocolate had a really nice and creamy texture and was somewhere in the middle of a yoghurt and custard in terms of consistency.  It was quite a nice chocolate hit without being too sweet.
They come in 4 small individual portions which means there is just enough of it to be filling but not so much that it's over indulgent.
I might try the dark chocolate next time, but definitely enjoyed the silky smooth.

Humdinger Dairy Free Chocolate Buttons

I recently discovered these chocolate buttons by chance and picked a packet up to try them. 
They initially tasted very sweet but as I progressed through the packet I focused more on the chocolate-y taste.
I like that they come in a small packet as I don't think I could handle too many at once as they are quite rich in taste.
Very tasty though, I've made a fair few repeat purchases.


Plamil Chocolate 

Technically, this empty is the chocolate snowmen from their Christmas range but having already tasted one of their bars, I can safely say they taste the same!
I haven't tried as much of Plamil's chocolate yet but I've enjoyed what I've tried so far.
Taste wise it reminded me a little bit of cooking chocolate, which isn't a bad thing, I like cooking chocolate!

They also do a range of other products like chocolate spread which I have tried and it's awesome but the jar isn't empty yet so I've cheated slightly and included it anyway!

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