Knilly Frickers

Dear Wee Rachel,  Learn to say no. No is a great word, use it! You are great at using it! Whether it’s your brother asking if he can use your room to watch TV (the TV you have in there right now is pants, so for context, you end up with Gran Brown’s big ass telly at some point, never mind why) or Mum asking if you have or will tidy your room.  At some point over the years, I can’t really remember when, you develop this compulsive need to please people, to have them think that you are effortlessly nice and will always say yes and find a way to help them if you can.  Don’t misunderstand me, it’s not a bad way to be but sometimes Rachel, I could have kicked you hard in the face with a thousand stilettos - you’ll never own any because you’d break your neck and you’d look like an idiot, but that’s irrelevant.  Saying yes is fine, being nice is a fantastic thing to be, but this fear of saying no is not even close to being acceptable.    People will still lik...

Dear Wee Rachel,  Sleep is a beautiful thing! You don’t realise it right now, but you have this amazing ability to sleep at night, to just switch off your brain, lie down and sleep.   Sometimes your head might be full of crap that finds its way into your dreams but the actual sleeping part you have down to a tee.  In a few years, sleep will seem like a story, a fairy-tale like Cinderella or Snow White (I thought Sleeping Beauty would be a cruel example, but hey, at least that bitch got some sleep!). I don’t know why sleeping became a problem, it might be the fizzy juice that you drink (I know you love Irn Bru, but your insides are probably orange by now, cut down a bit!) it could be all the time you spend in front of the computer, the TV or your phone (FYI, phones are cooler in the future, but bloody expensive!).   Whatever it was, it became an issue and it’s one you’ll fight for a while, I’m still fighting it now. I’m writing you this letter because I’m struggling t...

Dear Wee Rachel,   What are you doing with your life?  It’s a dreaded question for anyone, whether you’re a handsomely paid director of a big ass organisation or a former child star with a fading profile and a catchphrase to your name (you’re neither by the way!). Generally speaking, no one is 100% happy with every aspect of their lives, even the lucky sods who seemingly have everything in their lives figured out – news flash, they don’t!  Some people have a better answer to that question than others, “I’m a director of a big organisation” probably sounds better than “I’m unemployed and focusing on my sitcom reruns” but the good answers probably don’t include the crappy things that keep them awake at night, the pressures of their job or the lack of time they have to do things away from their high stress careers. If you are sitting thinking that your life is a bit crap and you don’t have a scooby how you are going to change it, welcome to the boat, absolutely everyone on t...

I started writing letters to my younger self last summer, shortly after my contract on my job ended and I was looking for something to do to pass the time in between application forms and volunteering. These eventually turned into a bit of self therapy for myself when I was feeling a bit crappy and I thought I would put some of them up on my blog, I've edited a few bits like changing 25 to 26 and circumstances that have changed etc.  I'll play it by ear whether I put any more on, I'm unsure, but here was the first one I wrote myself.  Dear Wee Rachel,    Rachie, Rach or whatever variation of Rachel you are going by at the present moment. It’s me, well it’s you, I’m you, but I’m future you! Don’t be scared, I’m perfectly normal, well, I’m as normal as you are.   There will be times when you wonder and imagine what it will be like to be me - I remember what it was like to be you! I wanted to get in touch, I don’t want to spoil your hopes a...